You Could Save A Couple Minutes On Your Drive If You Would Only Hear Me Out For The Next Half Hour (Guest Column By Your Dad)

If you're leaving Tottenham for Alliston and it's anywhere near one of the times of day when you could get a train, take the third line up to the Adjala-Tecumseth Townline. That is, if you're up by the funeral home. If you're around the four corners, take the fourth line. But if it's icy, I'd wait the train out because plows will do Tottenham Road before doing  the Townline. If it's windy AND icy, then Tottenham Road can have snow drifts and so I'd say you'd better stay home. 

If someone’s going too slow, don’t tailgate. You could be going to the same plaza, family reunion, or maybe you work together, or maybe you’re married to someone in the car. What you’re going to want to do is turn onto a concession and find your way ahead of them, but don’t turn onto the eighth line since it veers south. Take the ninth because it’s paved, straight and not too hilly. 

As a side note, if a train ever starts backing up, don't wait it out. Cut your losses, turn around, and find another route. And when you turn into the Vince’s plaza, slow right down. It’s so steep getting in there you could ruin your bumper.

Now if you're coming south towards Alliston on King past Dairy Queen and need to get to Albert, go straight if the lights are green. But if you see a red light at either the cross walk by Zehrs or the light by the Eden Grill plaza, turn left on Wellington or Nelson and zigzag southwest to Albert. A left onto Albert can be tricky, so do what’s best for the time of day.

If you need to get to Bradford, avoid going through Beeton unless someone has to pee. Now you could probably use a washroom in the library or the arena free of charge, but if they’re closed, you’ll have to buy a coffee somewhere. If you’re the type to read the second-to-last paragraph in an article, you should probably go to Henriette’s, but otherwise there is a Tim Horton’s.

If you are ever coming east from the Alliston Home Hardware on 89 and get a red at the lights near McDonald's, know that you have a lot of time to kill. While you wait it out, you could write a shopping list, try to remember the name of a song, or clean your sunglasses, but stay off your phone and stay away from that Alliston Gerald website I keep hearing about.